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Sticking your neck out

That’s all dating is, really…finding two people who want to stick their neck out and see if there might be a match.

I’ve been getting a few messages wondering how the second date with Car Guy went. It wasn’t great. I think what I took away from that date was something that Maya Angelou once said…

When people show you who they are, believe them.

Maya Angelou

There won’t be a third date with Car Guy. He didn’t do anything hienous or egregious, but all he did was brag about himself, talk about how great his tools were and how much better at everything he is than anyone else, and he never once asked me about me. That was the most glaring part of the date. He can be proud of his things and accomplishments, but a second date is about getting to know one another and he wasn’t trying to get to know me at all. No questions about my family or my work, or what brought me to my town from California, nothing about my kids – I don’t even know if he realizes I have kids because he never asked. So no, Car Guy is a no go.

I’m not giving up by any means, I’m actually honing my search. I had a lovely date with a gentleman mid week that was really fun and I think there is a very good chance we will see each other again. I also have a date tonight with someone I’m really excited about. He and I have some life connections that are really unique and we have a really similar take on life and it’s challenges. We’ve been texting a lot and I’m really excited to see how dinner tonight goes. I know it will be great because we already have a fantastic vibe going. Now to see if there is chemistry in the face to face.

One thing I’ve learned over the last few weeks since I’ve been on the dating apps is one sure-fire way to have a bad outcome is to date when you’re desperate. Just like you shouldn’t go to the grocery store hungry, you shouldn’t date when you’re desperate. Bad choices are made. I’m not desperate, not in the least. I’m excited about the people I’ve been meeting and chatting with and I’m excited about the fact that the quality of men I’ve been conversing with are the kind that actually ask a woman on dates and treat her like a lady. I’ve been so refreshingly encouraged by that.

Another thing I’ve been given the opportunity to remember these last few weeks is that I can accomplish anything I put mind to. If you follow me on Twitter you’ve seen or read updates on #DryerGate. My clothes dryer went out. It wouldn’t turn on at all. This happened in early December as well and I was able to determine it was the thermal fuse, so I learned how to replace it. Then it stopped working again last weekend and I suspected it wasn’t the same issue again and started going part by part, testing with a multimeter and ruling things out. I changed the Door Switch, suspecting that to be the issue and it was on it’s last leg anyway -but it still didn’t start. Next, I tested the push to start and that was fine so I settled on it being the timer. I tested the timer and saw where the fault was and ordered a new part on Amazon. It came in yesterday and once it was installed, it started right up! Success!

Moment of truth!

I was so insanely proud of myself for figuring it out and replacing the parts that needed to be replaced. I fixed my dryer with very little help from anyone other than the sweet lady at my local repair and parts shop. I was on cloud nine and practically dancing around my apartment singing Helen Reddy’s “I am Woman”.

That is….until while drying the first load of clothes I noticed the timer wasn’t advancing and will just keep running and running. Something is amiss there and I am beginning a new quest to see if I just got a bad timer or if there is something else wrong that needs fixing. Whatever it is, I’ll figure it out and I’ll fix that too. I’m not giving up, it’s a matter of pride at this point.

The fact is, I did it all on my own and figured it out. That was a huge confidence boost in itself. It’s so nice t know that I can problem solve and get my hands dirty, figure out a problem and solve it. So, fellow Single Ladies (or Men for that matter) don’t ever think you can’t do something. If you put your mind to it, it can be done, and damn if it doesn’t feel like a million dollar lottery ticket when you succeed at it. Life is going to be full of challenges, but if you take a moment to breath, take a break and think it through, perhaps even breaking into steps, you can accomplish just about anything.

Also,….when all else fails, there’s YouTube.

One thought on “Sticking your neck out

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